I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
