All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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