it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
