i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Randomize
