Whatcha textin bout Willis?
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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