It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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