ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize