So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize