On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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