Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
