On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize