They should really pass out barf bags in church
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
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