So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Randomize
