I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
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