when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Randomize
