But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Randomize