Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
