I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
It's blow job season.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
