I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
