I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
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