You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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