Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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