wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
