Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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