People with herpes should wear stickers.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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