everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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