wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
