i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
