And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize