would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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