I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
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