Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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