Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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