And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
