you're like a bully in the Christmas story
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Randomize
