Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
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I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
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Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
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