You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize