I am puke
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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