I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
this boner is exhausting
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
wow bdsm is so cute
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