Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
She announced her abortion via fbk
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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