You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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