I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Randomize
