did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
