How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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