i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
