ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
