Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
