yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
