you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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