I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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