she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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