I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I think your dad took our porno
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
